Ugly Juice Discovers Pod People at Nerd Camp

Uh oh, Ugly Juice. I know what you're thinking.

What? I haven't even started typing yet.

You want to go on a tirade about how those stupid MBA students ruined Nerd Camp.

I...

You want to defile your reputation as a happy-go-lucky student/crafter who is just making her way in this little world, by revealing that you are actually a bitter liberal elitist with no patience for those who are unable to deconstruct the finer points of Plato and Rousseau. Don't do it, Juice. Remember what Elissa told you about employers finding your blog and discovering all your indiscreet rantings? Remember how you took off all of the posts about Snipey and The Princesses for that very reason? Remember the fine era of self-censorship? Remember how, on the whole, you still really love people and believe that they are all fundamentally good?

Oh, Blogger. You don't understand. I would never stoop to calling a whole group of people "feeble-minded" or "conformist." No! In fact, I wouldn't have said anything at all but for my concern that maybe those people weren't even humans at all, but mere pods sent here to convince us that our values were all misaligned.

You mean, you think you may have infiltrated a group of The Pod People?

I suspect that I may have.

That's amazing, Juice! What is their plan? Are they going to attack?

Their plan is to take us over, Blogger. They have already infiltrated some of the largest and most influential companies in America. I'm concerned, of course, because The Pod People are supposedly (and frighteningly) America's leaders. They are managing major companies that employ thousands of people. They are making decisions about production, marketing, and distribution that have global implications. We need to count on them to make ethical decisions in the corporate world both for their company, the national and global economy, and the well-being of their employees. We need to count on them to support equal pay and opportunity for women in the workforce, to understand and value diversity, to provide decent pay and benefits to their lowest level workers and to make informative decisions that may influence public policy. But as far as I see it, they're not looking much further than their next SUV. In fact, I wouldn't judge them so harshly except for my concern that they are supposed to be leaders.

You're jealous that they didn't invite you to join their discussion about the evolution of cul-de-sacs in the modern suburban era?

*sniff*

Your self-esteem was affected because YOU didn't get promoted seven times in nine years so you can't tell everybody about it every chance you get and therefore people never got a chance to find out how cool you really are?

*sniff*

You took it personally because whenever you talked, your words bounced off their thick noggins and then they rephrased your words into something that you didn't even say and no matter how many times you clarified your position, they refused to listen and they scoffed when you suggested that Alexis de Toqueville would be snarkily pleased to see that his predictions about America had come true and they took it all personally and ridiculed you when you agreed with de Tocqueville that America is full of conformists and suggested that such conformity yields apathy and ignorance creating a pervasive problem that is leading to societal rot and they didn't understand your disgust and yet strange relief to discover that some of them didn't even vote?

It was as though they thought my comments were a direct attack on their way of life.

They also didn't seem to be particularly receptive to the Wal-Mart comments.

Yeah, probably not the forum for that.

And they seemed shocked that Machiavelli's amoral approach to leadership "repulsed" you.

Yeah, what was THAT all about?

You have to admit, though, that it did amuse you when after you made one single comment about a rally you had attended, you became labeled "The Crazy Liberal Protester" and they began asking things like, "So, have you ever been arrested at a protest?" even though you didn't even suggest that you attended such things on a regular basis.

They were very adept at slapping labels on people.

Well, I'm proud of you. You've shown significant restraint and haven't gone and embarrassed yourself by resorting to ad hominem attacks or anything like that. What do you really think the whole thing was all about? Why were you so disgusted by these people?

What it came down to, I realized eventually, is that their values were all out of whack. They didn't talk about hobbies (unless it was golfing with other executives or something) or family (unless they were complaining about spouses or familial duties), or personal aspirations (aside from getting more promotions at work). Their life was their career, and they seemed to lead no kind of normal existence separate from that. And if they weren't talking about how many people work under them, or what suburb they live in, or how long their commute is, they were checking their Blackberries or just talking about TV shows or other mindless jabber.

I told you you were being an elitist.

Well? Would you want to sit around and listen to that for a whole week?

Nah, I guess not. Let's stop talking in generalities. How about a few quotes, shall we?

***

(On Ari, a classmate who is from India, and has been in the US for 11 years. He first came here to go to school, is working in IT, and is a legal permanent resident. He mentions that he is disillusioned with the current government and is unsure about whether he wants to apply for citizenship in this country. )

So...let me get this straight. You came here, benefit from education in our country, and now we're not good enough for you? I find this really offensive that we can be good enough for you to take what you need and reap all the rewards, but then we're not good enough for you to become a citizen.

***

(On Islamic Terrorists)

Seriously, what are they so mad about?

***

(On Racial Profiling)

Some stereotypes are just true, so why should we ignore them for the sake of being PC?

***

(On finding checklist in pocket of dress shirt)

Oh, look. Here's a list from a recent presentation I gave with my boss. I think I'll go post it on the board. That way I can remember that I did something important once.

***

(On how Plato's allegory of the cave relates to a classmate's failure to read up on the Patriot Act.)

We can choose to remain ignorant of things and therefore happy. Like the Patriot Act. Sure, I know it's there, and I can figure out what it says, but like the prisoners left behind in the cave, it's an acceptable choice for me to remain ignorant and trust that other people are dealing with it. If other people have the knowledge, that's good enough--I'll come out of the cave when I'm ready.

***

(On why terrorists attacked the WTC)(*my favorite!*)

They just wanted to be included in our Western society.

***

All right, Blogger's gone, so now it's just me, Ugly Juice, talking. A fundamental problem with the whole situation was that the MBA students were simply not listening. They couldn't figure out what everyone was talking about and therefore they were unable to have cohesive discussion. The failure to listen was the worst part, because while I am happy to speak up with an underrepresented viewpoint, when they're not listening anyway, (or worse, misconstruing what you say), what is the point of speaking up at all?

Okay, let's get to what I learned from the program, and this is actually the whole point of this entry. I want to talk about how the introverts of the world have it all figured out.

I typically think of the introvert/extrovert distinction as shy v. outgoing. But that's not really what it is. An extrovert gets her energy from others, and an introvert gets her energy from within. I am, as you all know, clearly an extrovert. I seek out and hang around with people that energize me and make me smile. That's just an intuitive thing, like a survival instinct. This need to be around energizing people was exposed to me during my personal demise this week, and it was something I had never given much thought to before. I was miserable around these people. There was no energy coming from them. Could I just retreat to some corner and read a book? I do enjoy my alone time, but that's how I relax, not how I reenergize. Without any peeps (and no cell phone service), I became more and more negative and sad. I almost did not know who I was. I got bummed out by stupid things. I checked my email 50 times a day. My disappointment in my classmates grew deeper and was unmitigated by any positive influence whatsoever (though I liked my roommate, a fellow law student, she had a philosophy degree and was perhaps even more dismayed by the situation than I was...she was too bummed out to be a useful energy source). By the time the last session rolled around, it was all I could do to internalize my disgust. I literally felt ill. It was amazing, really, and kind of sad. I said earlier in the week that I wanted to be an introvert. Man, those guys have us snowed! They don't need anything! Lucky! I don't want to need people. What a humbling realization, really.

Well, kind of a long, rambling, and slightly negative post. If you read it all, you are a true pal, and if you mention it next time when I see you I'll buy you a cup of coffee or something.